Normally a job interview is a stressful experience in which you engage with an employer by pretending to be exactly what they are looking for even if you don't quite match their criteria.
But imagine if you were invited to a job interview where you just didn't want the job and there could be no negative career fallout for attending and having some fun at an interviewer's expense. What would you do?
That was the question that was recently put to Reddit, and those Redditors didn't disappoint. Let's take a look at their hilarious and diabolical schemes. You might get a few ideas you'll want to keep handy!
1. Make The Interviewer As Nervous As Can Be
One Redditor suggests that you give the interviewer something to worry about, "Ask if there will be a background check repeatedly. Getting more nervous every time."
2. Play Secret Shopper On Your Interviewer
"Make them think you are a secret shopper, there to evaluate them on their ability to conduct an interview.
Make them think they are doing a bad job.
You: 'Hm, so were you going to ask me about my weaknesses?'
Interviewer: 'uh, sure that was going to be a little later in-'
You: 'Later? Oh wow... ok... ' scribbling notes"
3. Show Them Just How Sick The Job Would Make You
You could always indicate that you're sick of the job before you've even started, "How many sick days taken per month would you consider to be understandable?"
4. Use Suspenseful Silence On Them And Still Get The Job
"As a teen, I went to an interview at a fast food place cause my parents made me. I didn't want the job. The interviewer asked me why I wanted to work there. I leaned back, put my hands together, and said "Good question." But I didn't answer the question. I just let the awkward silence fill the air until the interviewer nervously asked the next question."
Yes, they got the job.
5. Let Them Think There's An Echo In The Room
"Repeat the last word of every sentence that comes out of their mouth.
It's as annoying as it is entertaining.
This Redditor is oh so cruel.
6. Coming On Way Too Strong
Where some go for annoying, others go for the major freak out: "Non-stop eye-contact with a 10-second pause before answering each question very slowly."
7. Taking A More Lyrical Approach To Things
"Speaking only in metaphors and hyperbole the entire interview, but none of the metaphors make any sense.
Example: 'What can you do for this company?'
'you see, this company is like a storm, and I am the fencepost'"
8. Pick Something The Interviewer Messed Up On And Focus On It
"I've had this exact thing happen. Had an interview scheduled but I had already accepted another job and forgot to cancel.
They (4 interviewers) showed up half an hour late. One of their questions was along the lines of 'punctuality and timeliness is very important in this field (lobbying). How to feel about quick deadlines and short notice? As well as sporadic and random meetings?' I said 'It really bothers me when people are late to meetings, especially when an agreed upon time has been set weeks in advance. Timeliness and punctuality are extremely important, I value other's time as much as mine, which is why I try to stick to my commitments.'"
9. Steal The Furniture
"come in, take a seat".
*leaves interview with a chair.*
This Redditor has worked out a way to get free furniture out of an interview they don't want.
10. Reverse The Way The Interview Works
"Give them a pen and tell them to sell it to you. Make sure to have a long list of technical-spec questions prepared."
Was followed up by another Redditor with, "Then tell them that they don't qualify for the job. Ask them to send in the next person."
11. Creep The Interviewer Out Completely
US Air Force
We think that this one might have them calling the police, but it's very funny to think about: "Ask how strict the sexual harassment policy is."
12. Pretend To Be Blofeld
"I had an interview over Skype once. About 10 minutes into the interview I really didn't like the way things were going, so I decided to just ride out the remainder as politely as I could.
About 5 minutes later my cat decided to jump onto my lap and his head and body was visible to the interviewers, rather than move the cat I lean back and start petting him.
The interviewers I knew felt this wasn't really appropriate but to turn it up another notch, I leaned forward, grabbed the half filled glass of wine that had been on my desk since the night before and took a sip.
Trying my best to look like a super villain with cat and wine, they wrapped up the interview fairly promptly and I finished my wine.
Didn't even get a callback."
13. Launch Into An "I Have A Dream" Speech
"I'd wait for the "why did you choose to apply here" question and just go into some long winded, dramatic monologue about how it was the greatest company to ever exist and that it was my lifelong dream to work there. Just like, really over the top dramatic."
14. Unleash Your Inner Cynic
This Redditor may be the most cynical of them all, "The best thing you could possibly do would be to just answer every question with 100% honesty."
15. Answer Different Questions To The Ones Being Asked
This Redditor has this down to a fine art:
"What could you do for this company?"
"My biggest weakness? I'm not a very good listener."
It's probably best just to make your excuses before you attend an interview for a job you don't want, but we hope that these ideas made you laugh anyway.
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