Let's be honest - everyone wants to be liked, and sometimes we could use a little extra help making sure that's the case. Good news! There are some tried and true ways to increase the odds of getting someone to like you, and all of them have been backed up by science. Some of these are so subtle that you might already be doing them without even realizing it, but if you aren't, you can definitely put them into action. Some of them work well for first impressions, while others work with people that you've known for a while. Read on for 15 genius ways to make people like you.
1. Mirror Them
Mirroring is another way of saying that you copy someone's movements, facial expressions, vocal tones, posture, gestures, etc. It sounds weird, but many of us are naturally doing that to different degrees all the time, and it tends to make people feel at ease around us.
2. Hang Out Around Them Often
There's a psychological term called the "mere exposure effect" where people begin to like people simply because they spend time around them. This explains why a co-worker might grow on you even if their behavior never changes. Simply saying hello day after day breeds an intimacy of sorts.
3. Compliment Them
People love compliments, but they also tend to associate the compliments that you give out with you as well. The psychological term for this is "spontaneous trait transference." If people hear you calling someone sweet, they're going to assume that you are sweet as well.
4. Be Happy
You've probably noticed how the moods of other people can rub off on you, and that's due to something called "emotional contagion." When you're happy, it inspires other people to be happy as well. They might not know exactly why they feel so great around you, but they will, and they'll like it.
5. Become Friends With Someone's Friends
One good way to get someone to like you is to befriend some of their friends. The concept of "triadic closure" means that people are likely to be closer when they have a mutual friend. Mutual friendships make people trust others, and automatically gives them something in common.
6. Let Them Know They Can Count On You
A great way to encourage people to like you is to always be there for them. Research has found that people do better on tasks when they're simply thinking of their friends thanks to the social support that friendships provide for people.
7. Don't Compliment People Too Much
If you compliment your friends too often it can backfire, since it might come off like you have an ulterior motive in doing so. Compliment people authentically once in a while and you'll make a great impression.
8. Be Warm And Competent
People tend to like people who are both warm and competent. The warmness is necessary to be seen as trustworthy, and the competence takes trust to the next level since people are confident that you'll be able to follow through on what you say you'll do.
9. Touch Them
If you're in the position to casually touch a person, as in brush their arm or shoulder, they might actually end up liking you more. Subliminal touching is so subtle that people hardly notice it's happening, but it still has the powerful to make them feel closer to you.
10. Focus On Your Similarities, Not Your Differences
People tend to be attracted to people who have similar values as they do, which is referred to as the similarity-attraction effect. When we share values, it reinforces our own taste and reduces conflict.
Authentic smiles can go a long way towards making people like you, but only if they're authentic. People always respond better to genuine smiles than merely polite ones.
12. Let People See Your Flaws
You don't have to be perfect to get people to like you. In fact, most tend to feel more comfortable with people who reveal the occasional flaw since it makes you more relatable.
13. Verify Their Thoughts About Themselves
Studies have found that people like to spend time with folks who verify their thoughts about themselves, whether their thoughts about themselves are positive or negative. This is referred to as the self-verification theory.
14. Expect People To Be Friendly
The "Pygmalion effect" states that people will respond to you how you think that they will since your beliefs create subtle behaviors that confirm the expectations that you have. Put simply, if you think they're not nice, you might act in a way that makes them not act nice. If you assume that they are, you'll support that belief with your actions as well.
15. Tell Them A Secret
Research has found that one of the fastest ways to form a bond with someone is to talk about deep stuff. This can be asking people questions and can also be revealing something personal about yourself.
Well, now you know some easy and subtle ways to make people like you more, proven by psychological research. These are tips that anyone can make use of. Be sure to SHARE this with your family and friends!