Stop me if you've heard this one... okay, not really. You have DEFINITELY heard these jokes. They're the bread and butter of corny teachers, jokester dads and those eye-roll-inducing email forwards that wind up circulating around the office (you know who you are). Self-described "ephemera correspondent" Phil Edwards has created the perfect response: an infographic logically explaining why these stale life observations have perfectly reasonable answers. He says that "there is no joy here, only truth," but like they say, there's truth in comedy and Edward's perfect deadpan is pretty hilarious in its own right.