We’ve all been there. Unless you’re 10 years old or extremely lucky, you’ve dealt with the pain of a breakup. But how you deal with it is the real key. What you do in response to the hole in your heart makes all the difference in the world. Do you suffer silently? Do you seek out close friends for comfort and guidance?
Anger or depression are common enough responses to a breakup, but one young lady’s reaction to being dumped by her boyfriend isn’t just awesome - it’s inspirational. In a public Facebook post, Brittaney Lynn Shane explains both how she felt during her relationship with the unnamed gentleman and after. In doing so, she not only set herself free, but is also proving to be something of a motivational speaker. Her words are resonating with anyone who has ever struggled to accept themselves instead of seeking the acceptance of others.
The first section of the message is pretty brutal:
You always told me I didn't look good with long hair and that you preferred girls with short hair.
So I kept my hair cut above my shoulders at all times.
You laughed at me and told me I looked ridiculous when I dyed my hair red when we were together.
So a week later I dyed it back blonde.
You would always point out if I was wearing to much makeup. (Winged eyeliner and mascara most of the time)
So I just stopped wearing it.
You told me tattoos and piercings were tacky and ugly. And would try to take out my belly button ring every time you saw it.
So I took out my piercings and didn't get any more tattoos.
You pointed out my stretch marks every chance you got.
So I did my best to keep them hidden.
You pointed out every time I looked like I had gained weight.
So I started eating less every day.
You pointed out every single flaw I had.
So I lost every bit of confidence I had.
Her during this not-so-nice relationship …
And after! All smiles and red hair and anything else she feels like!
She’s even gotten a few new tattoos for herself. What made the difference?
Self-love. Brittaney really turns everything on its ear in the conclusion of her post, and lets the world know that she’s done letting other people tell her how to feel about herself.
For almost two years you had me convinced that you were out of my league and that I just wasn't good enough the way I was. I did everything I could to be what you wanted. I did everything you told me to do. It still wasn't good enough. You left me for a younger prettier girl. Someone you could mold and shape into what you wanted. Like you tried to do with me. And up until a few months ago I blamed myself for everything that happened. You blamed me too. But finally I started to see the truth.You weren't out of my league. I was out of yours. I wasn't the one who wasn't good enough for you. You were the one who wasn't good enough for me. You couldn't accept me for who I was. When I took you the way you were. Your many many many flaws and everything else that was there. The only time I ever asked you to change was when I asked you to show me you actually cared about me. Which you never did.
So now here I am a few months later. My hair is past my shoulders. My hair is bright red. I've got a new tattoo. New piercings. Started wearing makeup again. I eat whatever I want whenever I want and weigh 135 pounds. I still have my stretch marks.
And I've finally gotten my confidence back.
I finally see myself looking back at me when I look in the mirror. Not the girl you had created. You have your life. Your new love. Your side of our story. But you no longer have me. Not in any way, shape, or form.
It's so hard for me to come out about this and admit that I became so vulnerable because of one guy. Something I always said would never happen. It's humiliating to even think about how low I got. But what gives me the guts to come out about this is the fact that I overcame it and I'm finally back to who I really am. — :) feeling free.
H/T: Brittaney Lynn Shane